Thats it...No this is it!

Ok, I have had a rough couple of days/months so I am gonna get it all out now! I am just sick of being sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm sick of puking, being sore, being tired and grouchy and of just being a Monster! I apologize for sounding whiny but that's the point! I am gonna let it all out and then move on from here and I won't complain anymore - (OK, lets be reasonable!) Let me rephrase that - I will try my hardest to keep my complaints minimal and look for more of the positive.

This pregnancy is sooooo hard compared to the last. And that's the magic words "Comparable to the last." Because preggy life was waaaaayyyy to easy when I was prego with McCoy. I remember thinking, "I don't know why pregnancy gets such a bad rap, this is so freaking easy!" Ahhh, I was cursed by every mother I came across! They all said, "Oh, if this one is easy your next one will be miserable!" Damn you all! (I don't mean it, its just my preggy grouch monster talking).

That's right, I have a preggy grouch monster that lives inside me and she frequently comes out and says not nice stuff. She is very irritable, especially when she doesn't eat every two hours and or doesn't get her rest time during the middle of the day. And trust me, you don't want to make her mad. You will not like her when she is angry! She can't stand most smells, the stupid faces people make, and sometimes even the way you breath or blink will annoy her. (She is bad news) But the good news is I can keep her in check most of the time.

I think the main problem is I just had completely different expectations of how this pregnancy was going to go based on my first one. So it has been hard for me to adjust.

An upside thus far is that I think I am finally starting to see an end to the puke portion of all this. Puke days are getting few and further between. The current downfall is a stupid head cold. At first I tried to flush it out with liquid because I didn't want to take any meds but after a couple of days I caved and sent Glade to the pharmacy to get whatever they would give him. Now I am left with the most annoying cough ever. The cough brings out the preggy grouchy monster bad! I can't sleep at night because I'm coughing up crap all night long. I've tried all safe remedies- nothing works. There is just a constant tickle that will not go away. I have stomach pains because I cough so much, and this is gross, but sometimes I "leak" when I cough to hard! It is disgusting I know! There is just so many things with this pregnancy that freak me out and disgust me. Things I never had to deal with the first. I was healthy as a horse with McCoy. I felt so great! I loved being pregnant. I loved the look of my big belly. I felt "Pretty." I wanted to get ready everyday and dress up and look preggy cute! These days throwing on whatever pair of comfy pants is clean is good enough for me.

I'm not looking for sympathy I am just looking to get all this negativity out of my system. I haven't posted much about this pregnancy because whenever I want to write something it sounds to negative in my head to even put out there so I just haven't written anything. So hopefully now I can move on to writing more happy thoughts.

My first happy thought... ... ... ... ...


I felt the baby move today! I have felt him/her move before but it was these tiny faint little fluttery movements. Today I felt with no doubt the baby was punching or kicking. It was AMAZING. Glade even put his hands on my belly and he said he could feel it too. Baby Blood must be really strong because he/she is still so tiny I can't believe we could feel him/her already!